THE STRAY ZONE

CHAOS

2011-10-01T07:12:00.002+08:00

i've been sitting up here in front of the computer for hours now without doing anything and just thinking of what me and my "we're just friends" friend talked about.

honestly, i like him because he's one cool person. he loves music and so i am. not everyone can appreciate my kind of music but he does. for a month that we've been friends, he really inspired me to move on (from my stupid ex) and just do the music. sounds a bit corny but yeah.

i understand that people come and go into our lives. many of them had done that in me as i do the same, especially with my cyber friends. But if there's one person i don't wanna go just like that, is him. i don't even love him. i just like him so much. well actually, i don't know how i feel about him.

if he's not that special to me, why would i spend my precious time talking to him over the phone for hours and chatting with him all night long? listening to his choppy skype calls while singing, laughing with his jokes, eating durian early morning in that street durian vendor, eating bulalo, and stuffs.

i don't understand. i really don't. ...

or is this like:

LIE.

DENY.

REFUSE.

and don't ever let your heart win.

SECRETS by ONE REPUBLIC

2011-09-10T18:30:00.000+08:00

I need another story
Something to get off my chest
My life gets kind of boring
Need something that i can confess

Till all my sleeves are stained red
From all the truth that I’ve said
Come by it honestly I swear
Thought you saw me wink, no, I’ve been on the brink, so

[CHORUS]
Tell me what you want to hear
Something that were like those years
I’m sick of all the insincere
So I’m gonna give all my secrets away
This time
Don’t need another perfect lie
Don’t care if critics ever jump in line
I’m Gonna give all my secrets away

My God, amazing how we got this far
It’s like were chasing all those stars
Who’s driving shiny big black cars

And everyday I see the news
All the problems we could solve
And when a situation rises
Just write it into an album
Singing straight to cold
I don’t really like my flow, no, so

[CHORUS]

Got no reason
Got no shame
Got no family
I can blame
Just don’t let me disappear
I’ma tell you everything

[CHORUS x2]

All my secrets away (x2)

grr.....

2011-09-06T12:27:00.000+08:00

I'M GONNA STRANGLE YOU!!

you keep on putting me in a situation where you only benefit yourself!

2011-09-05T07:08:00.000+08:00

my music passion went down when me and my ex broke up 4 years ago.

he used to be my number 1 fan, my supporter, everything!

after that tragic (LOL) i decided to stop playing piano, i decided to stop playing guitar, i decided to stop singing.

i even stopped having contacts with friends who are into musical field.

i stopped everything and isolate myself infront of the computer.

just playing RAN Online.

last week, i met someone from a particular local forum site. i will not go into details but we end up being cyber friends. we chat a lot over skype.

and that; we like this Bad Meets Evil - Lighters feat. Bruno Mars song as we always have this last song syndrome of that song.

he's a musician, and we actually have so many things in common (we can relate to each other and stuffs like that).

and everytime i see him playing his electric guitar, he inspires me a lot to play again. he's so good and he has a great voice.

for the short time we've met and for the short time i knew him, i so idolize him. really..

(flex)

*speechless*

"LIGHTERS"

means

accomplishing something, following your dream.

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa............. emo lng?

waiting shed

2011-07-13T23:46:00.003+08:00

"sana magkita ulit tayo"

sabi ko sayo,

habang naghihintay ka ng dyipning

maghahatid sayo sa kanya.

"magkikita ulit tayo"

sabi mo sakin.

pero di mo maipangako.

"maghihintay ako"

sabi ko sa sarili ko,

habang nakikita ko na ang dyipning papalapit,

ang dyipning maghahatid sayo sa kanya.

-hihintayin kita dito,

dito kung san mo ko iiwan,

kahit ilang dyipni pa ang dadaan,

dito parin ako, maghihintay sayo.

"mahal na mahal kita"

bulong ko sa sarili ko.

bago ka tuluyang nilamon ng

dyipning maghahatid sayo sa kanya.

alam kong narinig mo,

alam kong alam mo,

pero alam kong ayaw mo na.

kaya maghihintay nalang ako,

baka sakaling balikan mo pa ko,

dito....

sa dampa..

SMARTBRO (NO CONNECTION) for 5 days!

2011-05-06T14:18:00.000+08:00

So it all started last May 2, 2011.

As I was setting up for my home-based work, I noticed that my connection was fluctuating. I am an email responder so I should be careful on my responses; making sure that I sent it correctly and no "double send".

I called the SMART COMMUNICATIONS Customer Care, but they said that there's an on going ENHANCEMENT to serve us better, so I understand that.

May 3, 2011

There's STILL no internet connection and I was like "what kind of ENHANCEMENT IS THAT!!". I called the SMART COMMUNICATION hotline again. The CSR I talked to said, "we can't do anything about it Ma'am". Okay I just said to myself, "patience is a virtue Aia, naging CSR ka rin."

May 4

The same, no internet connection. I called again. The one I talked to assisted me technically over the phone but nothing happened. He said, he will just send me a technician to check over our antenna.

May 5

Nothing happened. I called again and again and again. I already forgot that I was a CSR before, and screamed over that girl CSR who said that my schedule for the technician to come over was moved to June 1. "So, June 1 pa ko mkakapag trabaho nito!!" Good thing, I don't do trash talk.

May 6.

I called again because there's still no internet connection but I wasn't expecting anymore because they said that the technician will be available again on May 8 but expected the unexpected. In fact, I already scheduled myself to go to an internet shop to rent pc to do my job.

Surprisingly, someone called me over the SMART number I used and it's the technician.

Now, I have my connection after 5 days!! weeew!

AJ PEREZ died at the age of 18

2011-04-17T04:20:00.002+08:00

It's just so sad that a young actor like AJ Perez left so soon. You'll never know when you'll be gone! This is so sad.

AJ Perez had vehicular accident in Tarlac just awhile ago, April 17th 12:10am on his way home. He suffered multiple head injuries causing his death.

Source: http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/entertainment/04/16/11/actor-aj-perez-killed-tarlac-highway-accident

ZEST AIRWAYS ONLINE BOOKING ACCEPTS UNIONCARD EON DEBIT CARD :)

2011-03-18T07:58:00.001+08:00

Me and my friends are going to Manila this April 2 for the E-games Domination 5 event. But then it's not a business trip so we're looking for the cheapest fare, we'll just go there to meet online game friends.

ZEST AIRWAYS is the answer! Lol.

Sad to say, Zest Airways booking online don't accept Bancnet Cards which many of us has and me and my friends doesn't have a credit card only debit card. So we were wondering if Zest Airways accepts Unionbank EON debit card.

We emailed the customer care of Zest Airways but then no reply. We even tried to call, but nobody answers, we asked them in there Facebook fanpage but still no reply. Since the day is fast approaching, I tried it myself.

And yes, it worked. Zest Airways online booking accepts Unionbank Eon Debit card. Good thing I have one.

Cinderella's Sister (Minor Waltz)

2011-02-08T13:04:00.000+08:00

I had really been a Koreanovela fan ever since. I don't know but I always like the way they do the whole story thing and especially the soundtrack.

I can't even count now how many Korean movies and Korean novels I had ever seen and how many crushes I had. Lol. And I even wished my next life would be a Korean citizen. Haha!

But I am writing this blog because of Cinderella's Sister. Yes I admit I am a Kapamilya (Philippine's ABS CBN Broadcasting Network) and had been with ABS-CBN for years.

There's this soundtrack of Cinderella's Sister that I really like the most. Not to mention that I play piano, that's why I always appreciate classical music. I had been looking for this thing that they play in Cinderella's Sister and I got it! Thanks to youtube. Lol.

missing my TL's.

2011-01-16T06:30:00.001+08:00

i remember what Sir Gary of Six Eleven Global Services told us during a meeting about our tardiness, that.. when you wake up and start preparing yourself for a work, always think of your loved ones or stuffs that would inspire you to go to work and do your work right.

even though, i am no longer part of the Business Transcription job as I chose to, that thought still remains on me.

i also remember what Sir Jay advised me when I feel like quitting the Chat Support of Global Connect e-Solution.

"Never quit!"

As the big catch is in the deep. you can't catch big fish in the shallow water. Right?

now that I chose to work at home and that i don't have a physical supervisor. I'll be remembering Sir Gary and Sir Jay's advices.

Adsense Woooo!

2011-01-16T05:47:00.000+08:00

wow! biglang tumaas. .

ngdahil sa isang post. O_o

JUST DANCE OYE~

2011-01-15T04:00:00.000+08:00

*HOUSE PARTY!*

Today is Saturday and yesterday was Friday. LOL.

Funny when you're tipsy and your friends starts making "pakialam" your computer, or sometimes you join them tripping out.

...and the reason why I love blogging out when I'm drunk is because, I want to know what I did while I was drunk because the moment I become sober, I tend to forget things. ALCOHOLISM!

It was me, gwen and tara over the computer.

Me, trying to start working my freelance job and the two trying to open their facebook. Para kaming mga batang nag aagawan ng computer. May laptop naman. Hahaha.

Tara, our "taga gawa ng margarita", started become thirsty. Not the normal thirst but the alcohol thirst. To make the story short, we ended up drinking beer.

and that, we were tripping out with others over skype. oh well, my other account. that wasn't really a trip like, what others would think, but trip like responding them, and chatting with them.

Then came over Tara, who suddenly got offended with the lotion thing and everyone on the chatroom was like hating me, but I just ignore them. It was really like more than Tara thing.

She hates lotion and I understand her because she's a girl trapped in a man's body and she use lotion sometimes when... alam nyo na yun! hahaha! (i'm sorry Tara!) v^_^v

Me and Gwen was really like laughing to death while reading those chatlines and Tara's reaction!.

THE LOTION THING! :))

We even made this blog about those 2 pogi's who was saying I look like a cat/dog.

In revenge for Tara.

Well, the fun of getting drunk.

So I'm not going to expect gaining friends from that chatroom anymore. The account was mine so I'm taking the responsibility.

Lots of haters down here. LOL

2011-01-15T02:10:00.004+08:00

Please click the advertisement below to read the message. :)

PARAMORE NO MORE Josh and Zac. (T_T)

2010-12-27T10:03:00.000+08:00

I'm sad.

Josh Farro and Zac Farro are no longer members of PARAMORE.

This is Josh Farro's side of story:

http://joshnfarro.blogspot.com/2010/12/josh-and-zacs-exit-statement.html

and this is Hayley's

http://www.paramore.net/blog/announcement/

rumor's are circulating that Josh Farro's blog is fake but he actually confirmed that it isn't.

labyu

2010-11-22T05:31:00.001+08:00

I have nothing to say except that,

I LOVE ERIC MUN. hehehe!

FAKING MYSELF

2010-11-17T04:43:00.001+08:00

i was never really a happy person but i can't refrain from faking everything up; pretending everything's fine even if it's not. pretending the ambiance is happy, even if it's not. pretending i have money, even if i don't have even a peso, pretending i'm not hungry even if i am. pretending i have many friends, even if i don't have. i am a very pretentious person.

and yes, i have a major depression disorder. my mother didn't actually want me while i was still in her tummy because it was i guess Marcos time and my father got caught by the military and was sentenced to death because he was a media men but thank God it didn't happen.

i absorbed my mama's anxiety, depression, hatred and everything.

i started having depression disorder since i was in elementary. i am not close to my mama, to think i'm the only girl in the family. there's something between us. a big big wall. a HUGE HUGE HUGE wall.

my high school days was fine, it's just that i lived with my aunt in Surigao City. she treated me like her own daughter but something came up and the family decided to have my 4th year in high school in Davao City. my mama really is depressive sometimes. i don't hate her. never! she's my mother. it's just that we don't get along together well. there's a gap.

collegiate. i was with my papa in manila. my depression got worst. i wanted to be a psychologist but they wanted me to be a teacher. so i enrolled education that time. i wasn't really happy. so i became rebellious, i go home late knowing Manila isn't really a safe city.

one symptom of having depression is isolation. i do isolate myself from other people. piano is my bestfriend. i love music and my papa knew that. i can stay whole day alone inside my room with my piano.

parents wants their children happy always, so when they saw me that time unhappy with what i'm doing, they allowed me to change course and since there's no BS Psychology at my school, I chose AB Music and that made me contented with life.

i am a lucky person, i am thankful that i have a family who can give me my needs and wants but i have an obsession of hurting them sometimes. i love doing things my own, deciding on my own, i love being myself and when everything fucks up, i run to them.

but i'm still unlucky... i was born confused, lost and uncontrollable. i can't understand myself. i don't know what i want, what i need. i feel helpless, i feel like i don't belong, i just wanted to end everything. if only i could turn back time, i would not have entertained negativism but it's too late and it's worst now.

i had professional help before and she gave me anti depressant pills, but i guess it just made me worst.

anti depressant pills really would make a person feel happy even if there's no reason for you to be happy. you just feel like happy and of course...always sleepy. hahah! just don't take it with alcohol because you'll hallucinate and see bush like a demons. hahaha!

i really wanted to die but, i'm diverting myself now with blogging, i don't want to do foolishness as much as possible. God is with me.

still struggling, battling with depression.

i know someday i'll get tired of my everyday battle.

as my friend Marso said, "you lost the war, don't lose the battle" .. i'll try..

but i'll fight the battle with white flag in my hand cause i know, sooner or later i'll wave it.

Laughing Out Loud

2010-11-16T00:54:00.000+08:00

Funny when some people act like they're obviously INSECURE!. :))

HATERS are INSECURE. Diba? Aminin na natin, di ka magagalit sa isang taong di mo kilala kung walang something, hahah and that something is... INSECURITY.

Hay naku, PEOPLE OF WRATH SERVER [RAN ONLINE] tlga. Mga engot.! ahaha! kasali na ako dun. Masyadong kinacareer ang RAN parang mga tanga lang.

Anyway, got to sleep. For tomorrow I will go to NBI and report a CYBER BULLYING over RAN ONLINE. :)) pa trace ko lang mga ngbastos sakin. NANYT :)

i'll knife myself.

2010-11-06T02:48:00.003+08:00

i am Aia and I have no sense of direction.

i always do things ungrateful.

cry on me. cry on me.

i pity myself.

left alone.

no one here but me.

little girl, i'm not leaving you.

i will still be here forever until you grow up.

have boyfriend. get married. have a happy family.

everything bores me eventually.

i need a break.

i want a break..

wherever... forever...

I'M DRUNK

2010-10-15T23:12:00.000+08:00

yeah! probably i am drulnl..

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz`

Words VERSUS Actions

2010-10-07T13:53:00.000+08:00

I admit, when I get mad to death, I swear things sometimes I don't mean. Like, I WANT TO KILL that person I can't actually do it. Hahaha. Never! Such a disgrace to my name.

Just last time, I was terminated. Yeah right! but it's okay, it was actually my plan to leave to the company because of poor management. It just happened that I had 2 AWOL in a month because of these favors from "friends" but I never blame it them. It was actually my choice, to do the favor or not. But I chose to do it.

I'm so lucky I have friends who love me and believes in me.

It was just last week when I told this person who asked favor from me that something will happen to their accounts, because he keeps ignoring my favor you know, I GOT MAD.. so MAD!

And after how many days, he got hacked. I was totally shocked! I might had said something but I did not do it. Creepy. Unbelievable. Just last May, when me and Davey had this heartbreaking fight, I cursed that he will not pass the Nursing Board Exam, and yes he did not pass the board exam. He's not bobo you know, maybe it was just karma, he's a heart-breaker. There was also this incident when a guy who made me cry because of his 'pambabastos', I told him 'masagasaan ka sana!', nasagasaan nga!. O_O

I don't wanna say things like that anymore, maybe the devil is with me, wahah!. no no no, i'm not a devil's advocate, never!

Hacking is not my thing. I can't do it. But for these accusations I have right now, I'd better keep quiet because if I do, it just means I am feeding their satisfaction. I am entertaining their little brains of happiness. Hehehe. I'm not affected anyway. And again, I MIGHT HAD SAID SOMETHING BUT I DID NOT DO IT. :)

Misty

2010-09-30T03:15:00.000+08:00

2:30 a.m.

It's raining.

I'm sat here inside the taxi. On my way home.

Thinking about how life would be after my call center life. October 12 is my exit, still unofficial. Surely I will miss my friends there. I know it's not the end of the world, but things will never be the same anymore.

I will really miss them, all of them. The over breaks. The lates. The reprimands. The "Shemaiah, LOG IN!", the "ANO YAN? BAWAL YAN? (caught facebooking), everything.

Though Papa said, "never make decisions when you're crying" I still decided to go, I really deemed it necessary.

Sometimes in life, strangers teach you lessons. The trial and error thing. And from my experience, I learned something. Never prioritize other people especially when the favor doesn't mean anything to the whole wide world. For you'll only realize later that you've lost something.

And yes, financial and emotional crisis is on hand but still, "SMILE LANG", there will always be a reason for this. I just have to SMILE AND PRAY. God will never leave me. I trust him.

I'm almost home by the way.

Always remember:

IT WAS MEANT TO HAPPEN, SO JUST KEEP MOVING ALWAYS THERE'S NO PERFECT ENDINGS

Let me leave you this song.

Perfect Ending by Straylight Run

RAN ONLINE PH DANCE (slumdoll)

2010-09-30T02:09:00.000+08:00

6/11

2010-09-19T09:14:00.000+08:00

I love my job. Two thumbs up. But, not every company is perfect. Our supervisor is so great. No doubt. But the management sucks! Like, if you got one absent your allowance is forfeited, whatever reasons you may have. Take note! WHATEVER REASONS YOU MAY HAVE. Last June, I got sick for 4 days, even if I have my medical certificate with me, they still didn't consider it and forfeited my allowance, 1 day of absence is worth Php3000+, what more if it's 4 days. It's so disappointing.

There was also one time when we were requesting for CERTIFICATION OF EMPLOYMENT for our credit card application, the HR told us that we are considered SELF EMPLOYED because we are commission based, and that made our SSS, philhealth and pag-ibig SELF PAYING.

..and yes, I am working for PhoneTag.

Even though we are the highest paid account ever in the company, I don't really think this is fair. THIS IS SOOOO UNFAIR!

and for this, I had made my decision. I'll just finished the contract I signed and just pursue my business.

Dear GM Tsong

2010-09-18T12:39:00.000+08:00

Dear Sir Bryan Dy,

Sorry po for intruding your personal facebook account.

Last Friday, September 17th nag event po kayo dito sa Davao yung sa Event Shop. Unfortunately, matagal sya nag open due to some technical issues that we understand naman po, not to mention na ilan samin naka absent sa work dahil sa kakahintay. Pag mahal mo ang isang bagay minsan nag sasacrifice ka diba? Hahha. Anjan na eventshop kaya di na po namin pinalagpas. Mahal po kasi namin ang RAN.

So, nag top up po ako ng 20k para sa 5 na account. BUT, ndi po ako nakapag purchase kasi bigla nalang nag offline (i don't know if it's the right term) which is so unfair tlga, the event was supposed to start at 1pm but it started past 5 na... then nag close mga 6:30. Isn't that unfair? Saktong pag upo ko pa tlga. It's not just about the EP na 20k, but it's also the 4 hours waiting there, and the absence at work kasi diba dapat 1-5pm =(

So anyway, I am writing you to appeal na sana po sa Tuesday agahan po ung pagbalik ng eventshop dun sa Quagmire, like morning (like, what the egames staff there said na sa Tuesday nalang uli). Morning po sana GM mg start na and sana po madaming station, kasi that time isa lang.

We are working people here who loves your game. Please love us too. T_T

Thank you so much for your understanding GM. Sana po nakuha nyo po ung punto ko.

Salamat po ulit and have a great day.

God bless.

-Aia <3

key of D major.

2010-05-19T18:50:00.001+08:00

Never knew how I came here.
It’s like, abrupt.
I never really actually cared,
It was like 2 weeks before you quitted,
That’s when I noticed you.
Your hair,
Your eyes,
The way you talk.
Everything.
-I don’t know what happened.
It just happened suddenly.
Unexpected.
And now, you’re telling me you love.
It’s just too fast.
We need to deny ourselves,
From our friends,
It’s like forbidden.
You and me on 2 different worlds,
Social and hermitical,
Friendly and cold,
Welcoming and isolated.
-I don’t know what happened.
It just happened suddenly.
Unexpected.
But I love you and that’s the only thing that matters.

BOTITS ..

2010-05-19T07:08:00.000+08:00

botits... it's where every VT agents eats.. . .

NO... NOT THIS ONE!

but this!.

John Mark, Madam (hiding) and Lovely

Gian and Jeff

Rhonnel, Kring, Jeff, Gian, Peter, Me and Sir

Jun Jun, Madam and Lovely

uhmm.. ME? =)

John Mark.. getting rid of Miss.. i don't know =)

Kring and Yul

Davey and Cathy

VT Saturday Hang Out!

2010-05-17T10:41:00.004+08:00

I didn't actually posted something here about my work because I might say something that would result to breaking of confidentiality. hahah!

anyway, why VT?

if you would noticed on my facebook account.. we always use the "VT" word..

VT... . .because that's our account's name.

So it's Saturday and we received our salary the day before.

First, me.. Nea.. Fai.. and Kring² met at Gaisano Southmall.

We were supposed to have our facial, foot spa and pedicure that day (May 15th, Saturday) but none of it happened.

Instead, we went to Carmela's son birthday....

and there we met our Sup sir Gary, Madam, Junell and of course. .. CARMELA! the birthday boy MOM.

we ate there.. and of course videoke while waiting for this 3 handsome!

oppss..

then we went to Damosa because we were suppose to drink there but it was so crowded (because o Kamikaze, 6 cycle mind, bamboo and other..) that we ended up eating at Dimsum Diner.

Sir Garry

Nea, Me and Ryan

US!. ^_^

VT Girls =)

Junell and Me. (wth!)

Kristine Joy and Madam Shella

Ryan

of course.. a night going out without beer is a night... WASTED! hahaah!

oh well.. .. it's Ralph's trademark!

it's 2:00 and it's time to go home..

not to rest.. but to continue the INUMAN! hahaha!

THANKS MADAM SHELLA POLINAR and NEA LEE FOR THE PICTURES^_^

it's Mother's Day somehow I care.

2010-05-09T03:16:00.000+08:00

it's 3:07 a.m. my time, May 9. I'm sat here in front of the computer. lights off.. nothing to do so.

*im so emo*

I can't believe this is happening again. Of all the people, why him? Grabeh!

baba na nga self esteem ko.. mas lalo pang binabaan.

gusto ko nalang umiyak ng umiyak.

i should have not went there. sabi na e. T_T

malungkot... malungkot na malungkot . .. . .

I HATE BATTLING WITH CHAOS!!

HOW TO "KUPIT" RC COLA:

2010-05-08T08:19:00.000+08:00

Step 1: Observe when Mama is busy talking with friends, then grab 1 immediately..

Step 2: Go to a place far from Mama.

Step 3: then gulp as fast as you can.

Step 4: Go back to where Mama is and give her the empty bottle.

BABIES AND TODDLERS: DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME!!

a day with NIKON D40

2010-05-02T14:24:00.000+08:00

I admit, . .I'm a frustrated photographer... It's only my father and my brothers who have the talent.. heheh. ..

by the way.. this is not the proper way to hold the camera.. ahahah!

--------

just a repost from my other blog.

pictures taken last July 2008.

uhhmm.. . .. many pictures to come.. hehehe.

what am I suppose to do?

2010-04-30T11:27:00.000+08:00

"if i lay here, if i just lay here...

would you lie with me and just forget the world?"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfZUxPF7AMI

less talk, less mistake-

2010-04-30T11:09:00.002+08:00

"You see, to be on the safe side, applying the “less talk, less mistake” approach, especially if you aren’t comfortable with the topic of discussion. This is where it is best to just listen, stay agnostic and talk less."

Even if someone is confronting you, asking you something that you know when you answer it, someone would get offended. You better shut up.

Situation: You have a girlfriend, but both of you agreed not to tell anyone for some reasons then someone asked if you already have a girlfriend, you answered "none" even if you know your girlfriend is just around, listening. ..

what do you think the girl would feel? of course, denied. . on the lighter side, if you answered yes, follow up questions would occur and that would make the situation worst.

“Talk and have the balls to back it up or else shut up!”

However, less talk, less mistake approach doesn’t apply when you know your principles are being compromised. You shouldn’t allow your fear of making mistakes hinder you from speaking what is on your mind or in your heart. Remember, if you feel a pang of conviction in you, speak up! Chances are you aren’t making a mistake.

i know.. i know.. ..

2010-04-24T07:07:00.003+08:00

May 12, 2007 .. when I told you I'm pregnant, I can hear your voice happy.. . saying you're already a "papa!". . we made plans and stuffs like that.. life went on... scared... because my family still didn't know.

June. .. you changed your mind.. .you want to abort our child.. but i didn't agreed, ..

June 11.. you greeted me.. and said. . .to just take care of myself. . and our coming baby . .thanking me for everything. . .. and that . . . . .you love me.
after that day. . . i didn't hear from you. . . you deleted me from your friendster account.. ym.. and everything.. you even blocked me. . .i can't contact you anymore.. your family i think is keeping you away from me. you're always not at home. .

i don't really know what happened . .you just vanished.. .a big question that until now i can't answer.

on the 6th month of our baby in tummy . . i faced my family alone.. telling them i'm pregnant and that you vanished.

i failed them , .. . the only girl in the family.. failed. . .

after 9 months of our baby in my womb.. she finally came out. .. and I named here Ava Ich Alilee. . .

i posted her pictures in my friendster account and publicized it for you to be able to view it.. literally, you just viewed it.. you didn't even bother texting me.. or message me.. you know my number..

on Ava's 3rd month.. your cousin ..called .. and said not to wait for you anymore because you just got married. it was painful indeed... i didn't changed my number.. i didn't privatized my friendster account (di pa uso facebook). . .for you to easily contact me.. but you never did.

...until Ava's first birthday. . . you called.. and said... . "baka mamatay nalang ako, di ko makikita baby ko.." but by the time.. i was already mad at you . .. and i just replied... "oo nga!.. iniwan mo e. . . and please put this words in your system! .. . DON'T DARE TOUCH MY CHILD". . .after that.. you didn't reply..

but honestly.. after all these years. .. there's still part from me waiting for you to come back and clarify things.. i can't move on with these questions in mind.. .

i have hatred and bitterness in you and your family... so in case you forgot.. . . . .

DON'T DARE TOUCH MY CHILD. . . not even you nor your family, your relatives.. your pets... nor your neighbors!. . ..

ASA . . .. =P

2010-04-22T07:22:00.000+08:00

"Getting dumped always makes a man stronger ,.. But then again men ain't meant to pursue happiness" - - - Jiraiya

but then again, I'm not a MAN.. so I can't relate to this. heheh!

People Come and Go~

2010-02-20T12:51:00.000+08:00

There are times when i sit in front of the computer and just think of all the people who have wandered away from me. I remember all of the people that I have wandered away from. And then I wonder, will there ever be a time when they might reconnect? Not just for a ‘blast from the past,’ but a real reconnection, a rejoining, a resumption of the friendship routine as if the split had never happened. Probably not, but it has happened, and I dwell in hope that it might happen again.

As much as we may wish it weren’t so, a plain fact of human relationships is this: People come and people go. Someone that we have loved with all of our hearts one day can, quite literally, vanish from our lives the next. Not necessarily from death. Not even from rancor. Sometimes simple circumstance can take a best friend, a lover or a partner right out of your hands, never to be seen again.

NOY NOY! NOY NOY!

2010-02-15T22:20:00.004+08:00

i can't believe my 2yrs old daughter "Ava" is pro "NOY NOY".

well, im talking about our "running for presidency" Senator Noynoy Aquino.

she's been shouting noy noy for almost a week now.. everyday.. as in everyday..

I don't know if she got if from his campaign advertisement were Baby James said "noy noy! noy noy!" at the last part.

personally, I still don't know who I'm going to vote this coming election. I have this belief that, the change in our country is in our hands and not in our president alone. some people rely their lives to our president, and if the president failed to keep his/her word they protest and do some "not so productive stuff".

I have read this blog from http://noybook.com that Noynoy Aquino is compared to Gilbert Teodoro. Yeah right! Gilbert Teodoro may be better than noynoy aquino.

but how can we be so sure that this credentials are complete?..

I think... the blog noybook.com belongs to Gilbert Teodoro. wahahah!.

despite all that, my daughter still shouts "noy noy" up to now =)

Plurk is the best.

2010-01-14T05:08:00.004+08:00

"I personally never liked Twitter. I tried to give it a go but it just seems like a huge pain to keep up with all the discussions by going through pages and pages of tweets and it all feels kinda cluttered to me.

However on Plurk i've suddenly found something that I love. Unlike Twitter I just can't stop plurking. Plurk however is new and I really love the fact that you can view plurks that have only been replied to so you can find out what has happened in a thread since you last looked so you are less likely to not find out whats going on. I also love the timeline. The Karma system is ok since it rewards those who are active in the community such as new emotions and stuff.

Plurk is the best."

..uhmm.. wala lang.. hahaha. post lang ako ng ganito.

love you PLurK! mwaah!

>>> www.plurk.com/xaiax
>>> www.plurk.com/straydoll

"TWO YEARS AGO"

2010-01-12T20:51:00.004+08:00

January 13, 2008.
i gave birth to a very beautiful God-given angel.

I named her:

Ava Ich Alilee

she was a healthy baby then..

she's not a cry baby even..

she made me have her as a baby so easily.
no "baby-demands".

no hammock

no baby tap

she sleeps alone when she knows mama is tired.

she's not even sickly when she was still a baby,

but. . .

when we transferred a new home..

she acquired pneumonia.

she was suffering from different kinds of physical pains.

fever.. cough.. colds..

but, thank God.. Doctors are there.
she's was ok after a couple days of medications.

"one year ago.."

she had her first ever birthday.

and tomorrow...

tomorrow.............................

and tomorrow...

is her BIRTHDAY!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AVA!

@ Evil Zone w/ Chan

2009-11-16T13:37:00.004+08:00

2009-11-13T04:01:00.002+08:00

virtual world is far different from the reality.

some people, those who have strong personalities don't really apply virtual worlds to reality. they do know, it's just virtual, it's just ingame.

boy met girl ingame. he courted him ingame. she liked him and they become one in game. feelings are involved. can you still say its JUST INGAME?

i don't really know if when a guy and a girl became on ingame, the guy suddenly get serious with her. some guys, have poor virtual reality. girls do have. im sorry to compare but, that's what i see most.

i got so seriously in loved with this guy.. INGAME. i still don't have the guts to have an "in real life" relationship for nobody got my attention yet. crushes are there but im no longer teeny weeny. =) anyway.

so, i was with him for almost 5 months. until he got cold.

every stupidity tear dropped from my eyes, let me realized that virtual should really not conquer your real world.

he's too far from me. he is just ingame. i haven't even touched him or seen him personally.

yah really. he is just a virtual one.
i should have not take virtual reality conquer me. i integrated virtual my daily life and activities.

well, i should just thank him anyway for the experiences.

i just hope he got nice life ahead.

bye alvin =)

KARMA~

2009-11-09T04:26:00.002+08:00

THIS IS JUST A COMMENT FROM http://jek-jekjek.blogspot.com/.

Karma is a Sanskrit word that means "action." Karma has commonly been considered a punishment for past bad actions, but karma is neither judge nor jury. Rather, it is simply the universal law of cause and effect that says every thought, word and act carries energy into the world and affects our present reality. Karma can also refer to the "work" we have ahead of us, which includes lessons from both our past and present lives.

Unfortunately, not all good actions have immediate rewards. You might see the positive results of positive actions tomorrow, you might see them in your next lifetime or you might not see them at all. You might be thinking, "If I'm not going to benefit, what's the point?" There is one. Every positive action you take has a positive effect, whether you see it or not. You just need to trust in the universe.

from: http://www.tarot.com/articles/karma/what-is-karma.php

YOU WON'T REALLY KNOW WHEN KARMA STRIKES!

2009-11-09T04:19:00.002+08:00

it's been awhile since i haven't posted anything here.

i was so busy with my school stuffs and ran online stuffs.

a mother. a student. a sister. a friend. an egamer!

homay! how in the world could i ever make it to blog something here.

anyway.

i just stopped by, hope i could have something to post here anytime soon.

take care readers!
(as if i have one =)

SURYUN

2009-09-08T16:33:00.002+08:00

ano po ba ang suryun?

ang suryun po ay isang event kung saan nag rerespawn ng mobs ang game master sa isang partikyular na lugar na ang drops ay golds.. refines.. resistance.. armors at weapons.

syempre.. hindi ka basta bastang makakapasok sa lugar ng pagsusuryunan..

kelangan mo ng wedding card or shibuya 1 card.

kung gusto mo nman ng walang card card..

may libre naman, sa practicing yard..

un nga lang.. channel 0. at ma dedead ka sa mga mamaw dun pag PK time.

ang suryun po ay minsan scheduled.

minsan din random.

kaya timing timing nalang. :)

eto po ang

SEPTEMBER
SURYUN DAILY CLASS EVENT/
WEEKLY EXAM SURYUN EVENT
(reposted: http://forums.e-games.com.ph/index.php?showtopic=182589)

September 1 – Tuesday (No RAN Alerts.)
Channel 1 – Shibuya 1

Kalayaan – 10:00am
Alab – 11:00am
Strife – 1:00pm
Fury – 2:00pm
Alamat – 5:00pm
Wrath – 6:00pm
Tala – 8:00pm
Havoc – 9:00pm

Every Monday
Channel 1 - Wedding Hall

Alamat – 1:00pm
Tala – 1:30pm
Kalayaan –2:00pm
Fury – 2:30pm
Strife – 5:00pm
Alab – 6:00pm
Havoc – 8:00pm
Wrath – 9:00pm

Every Wednesday
Channel 1 – Wedding Hall

Kalayaan – 1:00pm
Alab – 1:30pm
Strife – 2:00pm
Fury – 2:30pm
Alamat – 5:00pm
Wrath – 6:00pm
Tala – 9:00pm
Havoc – 10:00pm

Every Friday
Channel 1 – Wedding Hall

Strife – 1:00pm
Alamat – 1:30pm
Havoc – 2:00pm
Alab – 2:30pm
Kalayaan – 5:00pm
Tala – 6:00pm
Fury – 8:00pm
Wrath – 9:00pm

Every Saturday
Channel 1 – Shibuya 1

Tala – 10:00am
Kalayaan – 11:00am
Strife – 1:00pm
Wrath – 2:00pm
Alamat – 5:00pm
Alab – 6:00pm
Havoc – 9:00pm
Fury – 10:00pm

Suryun Weekly Exam – Every Sunday for the whole week of September
Location: Channel 0, Practicing Yard

September 6

Alamat – 10:00am
Tala – 11:00am
Kalayaan – 1:00pm
Fury – 2:00pm
Strife – 5:00pm
Alab – 6:00pm
Havoc – 8:00pm
Wrath – 9:00pm

September 13

Kalayaan – 10:00am
Alab – 11:00am
Strife – 1:00pm
Fury – 2:00pm
Alamat – 5:00pm
Wrath – 6:00pm
Tala – 8:00pm
Havoc – 9:00pm

September 20

Strife – 10:00am
Alamat – 11:00am
Havoc – 1:00pm
Alab – 2:00pm
Kalayaan – 5:00pm
Tala – 6:00pm
Fury – 8:00pm
Wrath – 9:00pm

September 27

Tala – 10:00am
Kalayaan – 11:00am
Strife – 1:00pm
Wrath – 2:00pm
Alamat – 5:00pm
Alab – 6:00pm
Havoc – 8:00pm
Fury – 9:00pm

STAY IN MY MEMORY by BIM

2009-08-06T20:37:00.003+08:00

i was browsing the youtube when i was pissed of with someone.

he is just so confusing.

i can't hardly understand him.

but, despite that.. i . . . . him

I found another point of view
just a dead end avenue
im growing close back to you
just want i dont wanna do
just what i dont wanna do
is to fall infront of you

and you can break and you can mend
for all the wrongs that you defend
you learn the hard way in the end

so stay in my memory
you can hide out there
dont take all my thoughts today
so i can start to begin again
so stay in my memory
you can hide out there
dont take all my thoughts today
so i cant start to begin again

so i dont wanna be left with all this
I plan to be there right by your side
oh it seems like this could be
just a dream with you and me

dont wanna be left with all this
I plan to be there
I plan to be there right by your side

so stay in my memory
you can hide out there
dont take all my thoughts today
so i can start to begin again
so stay in my memory
you can hide out there
dont take all my thoughts today
so i cant start to begin again

and you and i we had the stars
and you and i we had the stars
that you left over and over again
and you and i we had the stars
and you and i we had the stars

i dont wanna be left with all this
I plan to be there right by your side

so stay in my memory
you can hide out there
dont take all my thoughts today
so i can start to begin again
so stay in my memory
you can hide out there
dont take all my thoughts today
so i cant start to begin again

STRAYDOLL: LOST =)

2009-08-04T21:27:00.002+08:00

After 3 fights of KOTH: Junior Division; straydoll, Lost!. Well, it's okey. I won't whine for it. Anyway, it's understandable because its my first time to join those PvP events.. and this... i will charge it to experience. =)

I really don't know why until now I still didn't absorbed the lost. I joined purposely for experience sake, because I really don't have any idea about those PVP stuffs.

All my RAN ONLINE life, my only character is shaman. So, accessories isn't really important to me. Now that I have my archer, accessories really is a must. hahah!

Even though I lost. I am still glad that I met and chatted with GM Tsip, GM Tsong and GM Vrael. GM Hope that time was so busy so we didn't bother her anymore.

SPECIAL THANKS:

GM HOPE
GM VRAEL
GM PAPS
GM TSIP
GM TSONG
GM BOSS =)
GM JOY
GM LOVE
GM FAITH
THE TGM
(who inserted my accessories right away =))

-|-`Kashmir`-|-
TYRONE
PATRICK
PAW
JARED
and friends who supported me all the way.

(UNTIL NEXT TIME KOTH!!)

Wrath server: 07-29-09 CLUB WARS: THE SWORDIE PARTY.

2009-07-29T21:45:00.008+08:00

TAGALOG MODE muna tayo ngayon mga repapips. Naubusan nako ng English. YOu know! Vit water!. Hehehe.

Anyway, sa buong buhay ko sa Ran Online, ngayon lang ako naka party ng halos lahat swordie. Oh well, syempre, kelangan ng shaman.. Kaya aun, nasali ako pati ung isa. hahaha.

Wala naman ako masyadong maikwento sa inyo kundi, ishare ang mga pictures namin.

Kung swordie lang ako e, edi sana, meju mahaba habang kwento to kasi syempre, isheshare ko sa inyo ung mga combo skills ka echusan ng mga swordie. Kaso, shaman ako e. Ang alipin tuwing cW. ba dito, Ba dun.. Mh dito, Mh dun.. Fb dito.. Fb dun..

Buti nlng.. mababait mga ka party ko... di sila demanding..

I love them na!

Oh sya! eto na kami...

^_^

Good Luck ^_^

WRATH SERVER

GUILD:

``ShReK`
sG`eLites`
SePuLtUra

KOTH 2ND ELIMINATION: straydoll won by default.

2009-07-26T21:51:00.003+08:00

july 26. at about 10am. i woke up with the thought of "sunday is KOTH day: Junior and Extreme Division. hhmmm.. i was thinking if it was already semi-finals, so i logged in at the forums and shocked when i saw my name.. oh my God!!.. not again!!.. it is still 2nd elimination. and my name.. and my name.. AND MY NAME IS POSTED!!.. hhahaha!

straydoll vs Phillia

5:42pm. I am already at SG Campus CH0. Hoping to see KRIZANTIE there but she's not there. While standing there nervously. I saw -=ako`c`brian`=-. Super ready. I don't even think he's nervous that time. I don't know if he has a nervous system.

6:07pm. i went to upper market place channel 0 and saw some contestants there.

it was i think almost 7pm when GM Tsong arrived and we immediately started the elimination.. sad to say, my opponent Philia, wasn't able to come. so, i won by default.

picture picture sana kaso... natabunan c GM Tsong.

D`Memories

2009-07-22T22:48:00.000+08:00

sdfsdfafdsaf

KING OF THE HILL: 2nd match winner; straydoll :)

2009-07-19T20:30:00.009+08:00

for 3 years of playing RAN ONLINE. it really never came to my mind to join those player versus player events. i'm not even fond of PK-ing.

until, i decided to create an archer character, then the KING OF THE HILL registration opened. so, i thought of joining then since i still belong to the JUNIOR DIVISION. but of course, there are discouragements in my mind. i don't have those nice armor set .. good weapon and accessories. how in the world will i survive that kind of PvP event.

the first KOTH registration closed and i wasn't able to register. . fortunately after how many weeks.. the registration opened. i really wanted to .. but the cons are.. i dont have armor set.. weapon.. and accessories for that..

July 13, 2009. 1:45pm. .. someone encouraged me to register. Keep`Distance. he said, there's really nothing to lose. just try. so, i did registered.

July 17. a week after, my friend texted me that i already have my KOTH schedule. 2nd match. 6pm. kalayaan server. my opponent? -=seduction=- of PHOENIX. Dex Brawler.

i was really worried then, because dex brawlers are known to have cancelling skill and stuffs. and that really is my weakness.

i hate to duel with dex brawlers.. or.. it's just that i don't know to strategize my archer in dueling stuff. hahaha.

july 19. 5:45pm .. i am online already at kalayaan. channel 0. while ice breaking. i chatted with krizantie at the sg campus. an egames correspondent.

6pm when the Game Master greeted us Good Evening. I was really nervous then. so, i went na to the upper market ch0 and waited for my turn.

until me and -=seduction=- was summoned to N-Practicing Yard.

before the fight, we had a picture together with GM Tsong.

"picture picture bago matalo. hahaha" by -=seduction=-

after that picture taking, the fight begun:

first fight: "YOU LOSE" . .
second fight: "YOU WIN"
third fight: "YOU WIN"..

yeah right!.. i read it so clearly.. i won the eliminition for the KING OF THE HILL Junior Division Kalayaan server.

thanks to my sponsors:

-|-`Kashmir`-|-
(my potpot)

-|- _Shedz_-|-

and

PATRICK and SCI!!

~oye!~

GM TSONG.. :)

GLOOMY SUNDAY AT RAN ONLINE

2009-07-12T13:17:00.002+08:00

sunday is the most gloomy day of my entire gaming life, well maybe because of the environment. the very quiet and peaceful sunday ambiance.

sad to say, i don't have an extra money this week to level up even one of my characters.

BUT speaking of character's, let me introduce first my "characters".

first of;

slumdoll

class: shaman
level: 183
server: wrath
school: sg
date created: may 31, 2009

next;

straydoll

w/ GM Hope =)

class: archer
level: 157
server: kalayaan
school: sg
date created: june 20, 2009

but of course, my ever first created character:

-`misty`-
(hacked! but under the custody of egames)

class: shaman
level: 192
server: kalayaan
school: sg
date created: october, 2006

lastly;

(my pretty vendor)

salesdoll

those are my pretty ran online characters. as i've said, i don't have an extra money this week to level up my character. so, i just used my salesdoll to vend all my locker stuffs.

while vending, i saw GM Hope, plurking at www.plurk.com, and requested her to visit kalayaan server so i could have picture with her. generously, she said yes..

JM (IGN: jey-em) is along with me. so its the two of us who took pictures with GM Hope.

here are the screenshots:

pardon me, im not so good in angle - ing. hahaha!

first, it was just me.. GM Hope and JM.

then somebody saw us;

and another one..

but that is potpot..hehehe!

RAN ONLINE THEME SONG

2009-07-10T02:00:00.002+08:00

i was so bored when i surfed videos in youtube..

i typed on "ran online".. and watched videos from different players..

some are videos .. some are slideshows only of pictures.. even so, they are so creative with that..

as i surfed and surfed.. i end up with this very touching video from a man, i think, who fell inlove through ran online and composed this song.

(verse 1)
Sa game na to akoy nawili
nalilibang aking sarali
nakilala pa kita
paglalaro ko'y lalong sumaya

Pagod man at wala ng SP
na papaOYE aking sarili
sumasayaw gumagalaw
dahil kasama ay ikaw

(chorus)
Kahit sa isang laro
dito tayo nagkatagpo
nagkalila nagkasama
napaibig mo ako sinta 2X

(verse 2)
Ako ay sobrang happy
kapag ikaw na ang ka party
lagi man nadadapa
ito'y binabalewala
Ang lvl ko'y okay na!
basta ikaw ang kasama
kahit na akoy WEAK pa!
poprotektahan kita..

(Back to chorus)

(Bridge)
Sabihin man ng mga mamaw na ako ay weak pa.
At walang binatbat kapag ka duel sila Basta't sakin lang ako ay masaya kapag kasama ka!!

(back to chorus)

--

and for the chords??

C-G-Am-F

F-G x4 then A--

tapos D,A,Bm,G

that's it..

--

i hope the composer will allow me to do the piano thing on his song.

i love it very much ^_^

EGAMER MOM

2009-07-10T01:40:00.000+08:00

reposted from: akosiaia.blogspot.com 04-06-09

2009-06-25T19:10:00.000+08:00

im sorry if i haven't blogged in for some days.

i don't know why i get so "tamad"

^_^

2009-06-11T01:26:00.000+08:00

today is my birthday.

AN EGAMER MOM CONFESSION

2009-05-26T08:10:00.001+08:00

AN EGAMER MOM CONFESSION
=P

Let me just share you my experience of being a mother gamer. Yes, I am and I know I'm not the only one. Cool huh!?

I want to start this with a little introduction.

I am a mother now for 1 year and 2 months already (well, still counting) of a baby girl, named "AVA". Well, computer gaming isn't really new to me. I started playing computer games since I was in elementary, particularly in grade 4. My father taught me this. Even my mother, is a gamer mom also.

Though, right now that they are older, they chose to play LEFT FOR DEAD instead. and NO to TETRIS and PACMAN.

Anyway, being a gamer mom isn't really as easy as 1 to 10. First, you need to take care of your child and second, you are battling with your gaming addiction. Especially that the game I am playing now needs a lot of time for leveling up. Well, that's the essence of an online game. "Takes a lot of time to level up" (",)

Just last few weeks, i refrain playing RAN ONLINE for some reasons. I was hacked. Bad thing is that, I did not retrieved my character which I spend a lot of money, time and effort but to think of the good side, now that I am not playing ran online. I can spend much more time with my daughter. Can bond with her more often and can see her development now.

BUT.. QUITTERS NEVER WIN as they say. who said that I quitted my ONLINE GAME life? Never did I.

Now, I am addicted to ZX ONLINE. Yes, you read it right. I started playing it just last April 1, with the help of GM VRael. An eGames Community Game Master.

You wonder how in the world did I make it playing with a 1 year old with me?

It is possible.

If ever you encounter a gamer in your party that makes a lot of excuses in leveling up; like,

*Wait po ah! CR lng!. (My baby actually is crying)
*AFK lng po ko. Wait lang (emergency! my baby is bored)
*Kain lang po ko. Saglit lang! (my baby is hungry)
*aw. . LAG (my baby is taking my place infront of the computer)

and last but not the least;

if you notice my character typing stuffs like this;

*+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
*11111111111111111122222-- -+++++--+
*asdfasjffa jsdffnasdf asdfwertfjwaf

then, that's my baby!..

Now, think twice if your partymate AFK a lot and so reasonable.

Maybe that's me.

..aw, LAG!....... .. .......................................

reposted from: akosiaia.blogspot.com 04-06-09

welcome!

2009-05-26T02:49:00.001+08:00

this is already my 3rd blog site.

from ranmisty.blogspot.com

to akosiaia.blogspot.com

now, i come up to straydoll.blogspot.com

i hope that this will be my last blog page..

anyways.. welcome to my chilling zone!! (yeah!)